12.5.14

Grow.

I tend to burry my nose in news at times. It can be a hard thing to have a sense of global awareness because once you start looking at the worlds issues it seems like its a never ending abyss of darkness. Its crazy to think that every person has a different reality. almost 8 billion people in this world and not one story is the same. When I was growing up, my mom would tell me how lucky I was. That there were children all over the world starving. That bad things were happening. I happened to be born into a safe environment with parents who would love and protect me. I had food. A warm bed…. How quickly I learned to take that for granted. I was sneaking around doing stupid stuff with my friends, obsessing about how skinny or chubby I was getting. Drinking and doing whatever else that represented rebellion or freedom at a young age. It was so easy for me to unplug my brain and pretend that my problems were important. Thats what teenagers do right? Magnify mini dramas. My mom would say… "Aja you think you are a spectacle, but nobody really cares what you wear ." I remember thinking how "mean" I thought that was of her to say. Hahaha. Embarrassing to think back on. But all a part of growing up. Then slowly its as if consciousness started to seep in. As I grew older I could see myself more clearly, and then I started to explore my relationship with the world. With others. Everything became a game. How can I treat people? How do people treat me? How do I let others effect my mind? Why are my emotions unstable? What can I do to have more control over my emotions and my mind? What is "good"? I want to be "good" because I know that "bad" feels yucky. How can I be good? How will the world respond to me if I am good? How can I be better? How good can I be? Can I actually get rid of my selfish tendencies and my ego? Man I could go on for days… I went to work. And hope was blossoming inside of me. I was looking at the world through different lenses. I made a bunch of vision boards. Big cardboard collages of the things I wanted to attract into my life. Every time I got stuck, or lost, or afraid of the future, I made a vision board. I convinced others to make them too. I really did (and truly do) believe that if you want things to happen in life you have to visualize them and say what you want out loud. After years of vision boards my life started to change. First there were subtle shifts. And then it happened rapidly. I noticed that every transition point had a crossroad. Right before a major shift happened I had to chose a path. One of them was scary and exciting and unpredictable, and one path was safe and obvious and almost complacent. At every crossroads it seemed I was going to make someone uncomfortable. There would be people in my life used to the way things had always been. They had adjusted to a comfortable and predictable me. If I was going to rock that boat, someone would be upset with me. I found that as long as I followed that honest voice in my heart. The one that said "I really want to go down this path" My life would progress beautifully. A lot of times the transition points were horrific. I felt as though I was responsible for other peoples feelings. You know I learned that as long as my integrity was in tact, I would be okay. I definitely made some pretty serious mistakes at times. How I handled situations was less than perfect. I am only human though, and that means I have to practice forgiveness as well. Cant go around hating myself for things that happened in the past. I can however try to do more "good" in the world then "bad". And make right where I have wronged. I know this seems like a rant. And thats probably what it is. But I just want to say that as I sit and pay attention to the news and the world, I have a choice. I can either keep challenging myself to be better. To think bigger, to be more brave. I can treat the world with kindness and love and work hard to help those in need. I can be a good listener, and not be afraid to hug someone or touch their shoulder with care, I can smile more often. I can look at whats happening in the world and allow it to soften my heart so that I share it with others or think of ways to help. I can be conscious enough to not express anger to a common stranger over petty road rage or waiting in line at the post office. I can choose to educate myself, and challenge my spiritual thoughts, or lack there of.I can ask big questions and seek out the answers. I can create, I can invent, I can grow....

Or I can stay right here. Stagnant but safe. A little hurt by the things I have done, and bruised by the things that have been done to me. I can not pay attention to others, and not worry about what "good" or "bad" is. Not worry about a global consciousness. Not worry about what I am doing here or how I got here. I can not feel overwhelmed by what is. I can live inside of a small yet comfortable space where only a few people exist and feel really safe.

Sometimes the second option sounds good. So much less work. Almost like a vacation from thought.
I get it. I get why so many people stay in that space. Aside from the fact that its a privilege to not have to care, Its just easy.

Dont do it. Expand yourself. Grow.

Thanks for reading.
Love Aja

15 comments:

  1. Aja,

    As thunder rumbles outside my window, I scan my Facebook feed after reading a letter from a dear friend. A letter. No one sends letters in the mail anymore. It was such a gift to get a hand written note from someone I love dearly.

    This is just a small example of how things have changed dramatically in our world. I love what you said above. "Stagnant but safe." I think so many of us corner ourselves into this mindset. It's easy to do so this day in age with technology at our fingertips. Even shielding my three boys from the evening news has become a part of my life and that of my husband. Not just for the stories that are shown, but the commercials that flash across the screen blurring the edges of innocence in a young one's eyes quite easily. As a mother, I know you understand this too.

    Then again, we can't hide from the world. We are a part of it, and to live and breathe is a daily gift...a precious gem that we often take for granted. We've all done it. We will continue to do so. We are human, as you stated above. But my motto has always been, "Be the change".

    I'm doing the same as you. Trying. Every day I try to do something kind for a stranger, whether it be holding the door for someone and offering a smile, starting a conversation with the lady at the table next to me at the coffee shop, or to simply offer patience in an otherwise "impatient" situation.

    To be honest, I didn't know anything about you before earlier this year. You or your band. That changed pretty quickly though. My oldest son is a huge fan of The Glitch Mob. I fell in love with "Our Demons". I asked my son, "Who is THIS woman?! She's fantastic!"

    A month or two later my boys and I were seated close to the stage to see Imagine Dragons in Dallas. My youngest who is 10, adores I.D. Low and behold there was Nico Vega to open for them, and that grand voice I quickly fell in love with was right there in front of me! We had the chance to meet you...all of you. Blessed. All of us. We quickly became huge Nico Vega fans, and remain so.

    March rolled around this year and The Glitch Mob came to Dallas. I bought tickets to take my oldest. An early birthday present, and a special mom/son date night. The morning of the concert I wrote a blog post and tagged The Glitch Mob on Instagram. Later that night my son and I got to meet and hang out with Josh, Justin and Ed because of it. GREAT GUYS. We talked about you, Dan and everything in between. We've stayed in touch, and it was all because I stepped outside my comfort zone to share the love I have for music, and the arts in general. I've instilled that same love within the hearts of my children.

    My husband and I both believe in "experiences" over "things" for our children. The memories of spending time with their parents doing things they love is priceless. I'm eternally grateful that we have been able to provide these experiences for them.

    You rock, Aja. Our family adores you, Nico Vega, Imagine Dragons, The Glitch Mob...all of you. All of you are some of the most selfless people I have ever met. And in today's world, that's pretty amazing.

    Congratulations on all of your success! Reach for the stars. Be human. Be real. BE YOU. We need more of that in the world today.

    Blessings to you and your family, always.

    ~ Val

    ReplyDelete
  2. I've been thinking a lot of the same thoughts recently, this was an interesting read. It is very easy to take the simple way, and easy to take things for granted even if it isn't as rewarding. It isn't quite so simple though. This is a noble thing to pursue, but many have responsibilities which may limit abilities. Artists believe in creativity through limitations, to people like you this comes naturally, and it is a gift that you are fortunate to have. Artists can inspire though, some believe it is their job to, and being able to do that, is pretty special. Inspiration is all that some people need.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Aja this is beautifully written. I discovered you first through your husband and the first thing I loved about you was your amazing voice, uplifting music and obvious talent. As I discovered more about you I came to see that you exude such a positive energy and are a beautiful light in the world. I have been inspired by watching interviews and reading about yourself and Dan and how committed you both are to making a difference in the world. Your lyrics and your energy and your message have inspired me to examine who I am and to try daily to make a difference, big or small in the lives of others. One of the things I have learned from you is to thank those who make a difference in my own life and so I want to take this opportunity to thank you and Dan for not only sharing your incredible talent with the world but for being the amazing people you are. I am raising four sons and am happy to have such positive role models for them to look up to. As people I have never met you have had a profound impact on my life and how I choose to interact with the world around me. Even without trying, and just by being the person you are you are affecting people all over the world and bringing a positive light into places you have never even been and I appreciate and thank you for that. I wish you so much continued success, not just because you deserve it but because the world deserves to know you and I truly believe you have a message and attitude that can help to change the world. Thank you for being who you are and sharing your tremendous light with the world. You have inspired me to be a better person, to make a difference and to constantly evaluate, change and take the road that represents who I am.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Beautifully put, Aja!

    Big fan from Brazil here, (I actually discovered Nico Vega watching The Collector :P) And I agree 100%. I think most people are conditioned to just accept their immediate surroundings as all that matters, when in fact everyone's life is connected in one way or another, and the only way to mature is to take risks and reach out, making yourself a wiser, more experienced person. But the truth is, as long you're close to the people you care about, those risks are always outweighed by the benefits of growing up!

    (Great blog, btw, keep on posting, Aja :} )

    ReplyDelete
  5. Wow, what a beautiful text.

    It's my first time here and I was charmed logo on my first reading.

    I knew his work with the band Nico Vega through a your videos with your husband.

    What a beautiful voice!

    What about the text, always penalizei me for all the bad things happening around me. But after much depression, music, medicine and therapy, I'm beginning to understand that this is not so. Still grieve for the things I did, I did and felt. But I think it is now a matter of time before my vision with the world change.

    Kiss from a Brazilian fan.

    ReplyDelete
  6. aww Aja these words are beautiful I guess I'm gonna cry :') you have so much truth, I have to say you're now a huge inspiration for me
    I love the way you think about life I'm going to follow your example

    kiss and hugs from Mexico :)
    kikis :')

    ReplyDelete
  7. Hi Aja,
    I stumbled across your blog few moment ago, while surfing the net in a futile attempt to escape my reality. But this post has given me something I was desperately searching for, something I felt had lost in the course of time.
    I had been in a dilemma of it's own sort. But as you put it very rightly, basically I had to chose between the conventional way and the road less travelled. I opted for the latter a long time back, but lately as I announced my decision, I was told by everyone that I was making a grave mistake, I'd ruin myself and I'd lose myself if I went that way. They wanted me to go for the easy route, because they all really loved me and knew my decision required a lot of hard work, and also because they suspected I'd lose the momentum midway. At the same time they kept telling me I had to choose my own path. In short, they didn't have the amount of faith in me as I had in myself when I took that decision.
    When I turned 18 a couple of months back, I was pretty excited when I was told that I could decide for myself.
    But now, I wanted to return to my childhood when I had no responsibilities on my shoulders, when others took decisions for me. But this world isn't exactly a wish-granting factory. Moreover being the eldest kid in the family doesn't really helps in these decision-making moments.
    I felt weak. I couldn't find the determination with which I had taken the decision. That usually never happened to me, because I am perhaps the most optimistic person in my surroundings. But i guess everyone has his/her off moments. I was struggling to reason myself back to the state of mind I had before any extra pressure was put on me.

    Then I read this post. These words have given me the strength I was searching for within myself. It reminded me of the purpose with which I decided to walk on the uncommon path- to push myself, to test my limits, to work to the best of my potential. And I think whenever I'll waver from that direction, I'll come back here and re-read your post.

    Thankyou for reuniting me with my purpose. I am but indebted to you.

    Thankyou for infusing hope into my soul.

    You really are one of the most beautiful people on out planet.

    I hope Arrow and Dan are doing great.

    Love from India.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. P.S. Hope you excuse the slight grammatical errors, though. Oh, and I know I am talking to celebrity right now, but I just wish I had an opportunity to know you better. I'd learn so much from you, and any slightest chance of learning new stuff excites me! And you have already served as an elder-sister like figure with this post. Thankyou.

      Delete
  8. Dear Aja,

    Why don't you put those thoughts you have now into lyrics? Maybe one day you could share that with the outside world. There are so many people who can relate to what you are writing on your blog.

    all the best to you

    ReplyDelete
  9. Hey Aja !
    I recognize myself a lot in what you said about teens XD
    I discovered your blog through Nico Vega's facebook page and I must say that I love your way to think, I wish I could be as spiritual as you are, you're a great source of inspiration for me and all of my friends could tell you how much I admire you...
    (Does Nico Vega plan to come in France ? If you do i'll be the first to come !)

    Hope you'll see my comment,
    Marie

    ReplyDelete
  10. Hello, Aja.
    Your text make me think a lot. Who we are in this world? We think that we are important, or vice versa. We don't remember that we have borned in the belly of our moms, all the people have done it. We are equal, we are a lot of people different, but with right of the same things. My aspiration in life is change something, and I hope it will come.

    Hugs and kisses,
    Ana

    P.S. Sorry for my english, it is bad.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Wonderful to see you writing here again, Aja. Such a sweet reminder that growing pains are part of the Great Transformation. Here's to living true and dreaming big! xo Jen

    ReplyDelete
  12. Dear Aja,

    (very sorry for incorrect grammar)

    I really do not know if this blog is still active.. Today is my birthday, so I think it is time to assess my life so far. Today I would like to thank the people who have influenced my view of the world and helped me become the person that I am today. You (and of course Nico Vega) are one of those inspirational people. Thank you for your courage to bring light and make the world a better place. I think anyone can doubt that the journey of life that goes really the right one. (so sorry for bad english, again) I think there isn´t one right way. I think the only kind people think about whether their actions contribute to the good or not. But no one knows in advance whether their actions will have positive results. What is important is the intention for what we decided to do something. My favorite quote is:
    "There is only one piece of the universe that you can change and improve for sure, it's you."
    I really hope that Your journey interesting, you'll always be around people who will love it as much as they will love you. I hope that you will have opportunities to overcome yourself and always have someone on whom you can rely. I wish you to Ti in life always not work out everything as you like (sorry, but it would be a bit boring, is not it? .. And why it could not happen there anything better? :) And I wish you to be happy never lose the inspiration and desire to change things for the better.
    Thank You for being such a way you are.
    (thanks for reading this)

    With love
    Allee

    ReplyDelete
  13. Sorry,.. from the previous contribution..
    english is not my native language..

    "I wish you to Ti in life.. "
    in my language Ti = You

    Thank you again
    Allee

    ReplyDelete
  14. Aja, why have you not been blogging more? I would love to hear more of this... You are by far my favorite person in the world, and GOSH, I wish you would continue to blog. Posts like this are as important as oxygen.

    ReplyDelete